In today's world, it’s so easy to get caught up in the “do more” mentality. Women are being asked to do the impossible and it’s just not sustainable, which is why it’s even more important to slow down, hone in, and “do less”. We know what you’re thinking....how the heck can I possibly do less when everyone is relying on me to do all the things? And we totally get it. It’s actually incredible what women are capable of doing.
This magical power women have to “do it all” spans cultures & generations. However; we’re missing one key ingredient in today’s world. The village.
How many of us are holding down a career, making sure the fridge is full, rotating the laundry, feeding the family, growing a human, making sure school bags are packed, meeting with the teacher, DIYing the bedroom furniture, planning date night, finding time for "self-care", unloading the dishwasher, walking the dog, getting our workout in, all while getting enough sleep! The list goes on…and we’re exhausted just WRITING it!
So what’s the answer here? Surly it can’t just be going until you break. While we wish we had all of the answers, we do have a few things that help keep us sane on this topic.
REEL IN THE MEDIA CONSUMPTION
In times of stress it’s common to reach for a zone out tool, aka our phone. Sure, these handy little devices serve a massive purpose. Some of us rely on them for a sense of connection to those we love, a tool we use for work, a resource when our baby wont sleep and we need to read every possible sleep related article ASAP because we are sure the answer is there for us.
Regardless of what purpose your phone serves for you, it’s important to acknowledge that it can also be a source of depletion. If you find yourself habitually checking into an app, picking up your phone out of habit because you’re walking to the bathroom, or mindlessly scrolling whilst not really taking any of it in, it’s time to put it down and put it in check.
These habits while seemingly harmless are pulling on your already busy mind. Adding to your 24/7 list of “to-do’s” rather than helping you check them off. Each time we pick up our phone and end up distracted or with a new task to do we are adding insult to injury. Not to mention the fact that they are pulling us from true presence in life.
We challenge you to try this out: Put your phone in the other room to charge (even if it doesn’t need charging) and tell yourself you will check it in 1 hour. For that next hour be where your feet are. Allow yourself to be 100% in the moment you’re in, if a thought circles that you HAVE to act on, jot it down but don’t touch your phone. If you can make this a regular practice, you might just notice that cutting down on what you don’t even realize is such a distraction, actually means much higher productivity and joy in the areas we desire.
RE-EVALUATE HOW MUCH IT MATTERS
You’re exhausted but you just have to get that last load of laundry in the wash before bed, or that email responded to, or the grocery order ready, or.............
What will happen if you don’t? This is a question we’ve gotten better and better at asking ourselves when we’re feeling overloaded. So far, there aren't very many times when the answer to this question is life altering. Generally, the answer falls into one of two categories: I can do it tomorrow or it will get done when it gets done.
The truth is, all the things that once took a village are now on our shoulders and the village is often nowhere in sight. The crazy part about that is that we have actually convinced ourselves that doing these tasks are more important than our own rest and wellbeing. It’s time to take back our power of simplifying, delegating, and slowing the pace. Which brings us to our final “note to self”.
Momma, we were not meant to go until we drop, rinse and repeat. We need rest to connect fully to our deepest self, to feel revived physically and mentally.
So, if you still feel like you need a little pep talk to help you better prioritize slowing down and resting check out Mom Slow Down by Jessica Gershman or Do Less by Kate Northrup. These mommas have it down and are sharing their best with all of us.
Give yourself permission, Momma, and if you just simply can’t, then use this as your permission slip. Take time right now to breath deep, step outside and look up. Relax your jaw and your shoulders. Tend to your internal needs and allow space for rest, right here, right now, in this moment. We’ll do it with you.
Ready… Set… GO!
Mandy & Kalie